Best Trini quote of 2007

"If a man comes to attack you and he is armed, you do not have to wait
for him to kill you for you to defend yourself," - Ramesh Lawrence
Maharaj

Source: Trinidad Guardian Dec 9th, 2007

Waiting for Justice

According to Wikipedia, the population of New York as of 2006 was 19,306,183. New York is a total of 54,475 square miles (141,089 km²) in area, making it the third most populous city in the USA.
According to Wikipedia, the population of Trinidad and Tobago as of 2005 was 1.3 million. Trinidad and Tobago is a total of 1,979 square miles (5,128 km²) in area, making it a fraction of the size of New York.
According to the BBC, the murder rate in New York for the year was 428 as of November 18.
According to the Express, Guardian, Newsday, Bomb, Punch, Tanty, Granny and everybody else, the murder rate so far in Trinidad and Tobago is 338.
So could someone explain to me how the hell a country that is the size of a pimple on the face of New York could have a murder rate that almost as high as that of New York? Even more disturbing is the fact that while New York's murder rate is going down and is presently at the lowest it has been in 40 years, in T&T ours seems to be going up.
According to the BBC,

The soaring murder rate of the late 1980s and early 1990s was largely a result of turf wars between gangs running the crack cocaine trade. The turnaround in violence from the early 1990s was attributed to the city's zero tolerance policy, which saw police crack down on minor offences and drug dealing.

Gang warfare? That sounds familiar. But zero tolerance policy? Even on minor offences? Eh eh. Not in sweet T&T where anything goes, and our national motto is "Free Up Yourself".
In addition to the attitude of citizens, a big part of the problem is the ridiculous justice system where cases are tied up in courts for years and years. The Bible as a book of wisdom explains T&T's position quite simply but accurately in Ecclesiasties 8:11. It says:

When the sentence for a crime is not quickly carried out, the hearts of the people are filled with schemes to do wrong.

Plain and simple, there is the root cause of our problem. Everybody could do anything and get off scot free, so everybody does what they want.
Even in the schools, students rule because they can't be disciplined or expelled for bad behaviour, so they do what they want.
Murder, crime, violence, road deaths; all are tied in to the lack of accountability in T&T. Anything goes in this sweet land of ours.
To the authorities... Bring back accountability. Please fix our justice system or lack thereof. It's killing T&T.

P.S. If you want to have media briefings from the police, please find someone who can speak clearly and fluently and who will not pause after every three words to think of what to say next. It's annoying to have to listen to that sort of nonsense and it makes those who run the system appear even more incompetent.

Panday's last stand

Basdeo Panday, you are an idiot. I have to say that after listening to the tirade you unleashed subsequent to losing the general elections in Trinidad and Tobago. You practically blamed the Congress of the People for the UNC-A's loss, saying that they split the vote and took away votes that would have gone to the UNC. Mr Panday, for your information, if somebody wants to vote for you they will, whether or not there is another party on the scene.

I know for a fact that a great many of the people who voted for the COP were people who would have traditionally voted for the PNM as what they considered the lesser of two evils, the greater evil being you. These folks were tired of both the PNM and the UNC and wanted change. The people who voted COP didn't want you, Bas. What they wanted was something new, and not the same old stupid talk. You have nothing new to offer. So sit down, take back the Opposition Leader post from Kamla (like how you take everything else from her) and shut up. You will never be Prime Minister of Trinidad and Tobago again.

The real meaning of politics

Politics: from the Greek "poly" (meaning "many") and "ticks" ("bloodsucking parasites").
A lot of bloodsuckers are running around this weekend. They've already bitten thousands, but I'm not worried. The invasion soon will be over. They'll disappear again and go back to their own pursuits come November 6.

T&T still waiting to take pole position

Yesterday I was going to write and complain about the PNM campaign truck loaded with speaker boxes that drove down my street and became entangled in the electricity wires, pulling them down together with telephone and cable lines, causing the concrete pole to break and plunging my entire area into darkness for five hours. I said I would not have complained because the lack of computer and TV helped my wife and I to bond. There was no light, so we had a candlelight dinner of potato salad and apple juice. We talked, we laughed like idiots and made noise and it was good to get away from the routine of things and just take time to relax together. We got to know each other a little more and it was nice. After a while I didn't really mind that the computer shut off in the middle of my work and I lost everything I had done since my last save.
But oh gosh I have to complain. When I could pass down the street and see the broken electricity pole hanging over the road like an archway, waiting to fall on someone or their car, I must get vex. I know the TTEC people leave the pole because TSTT and the cable company have to come and handle their wires. Let me say, I have not much complaints about TTEC. Anytime there is a breakdown, a crew is dispatched very quickly, and service is restored in reasonable time, at least in my experience. When the incident happened yesterday, within five minutes TTEC was on the job. Where was TSTT? Where is the cable company? Still these people treat citizens with scant courtesy. Perhaps they are waiting for the pole to fall on someone's head before the do something about it, then apologise for the "unfortunate incident."
Despite all the talk of vision 2020, once again we have evidence that Trinidad and Tobago is still living in the 19th century.

The United National Congress of the People's National Movement

Trinidad sweet, yes. I got these in my email today. I would think it was staged, but still interesting. If only such unity were really possible. T&T might have been a better place to live in.

And the Next Award Winner Is...

From the Trinidad Guardian Monday 15th October

42 held in two-day police raids

BY RADHICA SOOKRAJ

South Western Divisional Task Force police surrounded the Siparia cemetery on Saturday night and busted a drug den, ending a two-day exercise that netted 42 people.

As the suspects fled in various directions, officers managed to apprehend a 26-year-old man who sought refuge under a tombstone. The suspect was caught lying on his abdomen clutching 20 grammes of marijuana.


At the end of the exercise, a total of 12 people were held for drug-related offences. Three others were held for breaching protection orders, 23 were nabbed on outstanding warrants, while four were held for burglary, larceny, assault occasioning a wound and disorderly behaviour.

The suspects are expected to appear before a Siparia Magistrate today to answer the charges.

What I want to know is how stupid you have to be to see the police chasing you, and before you get rid of the evidence, you lying down on it and trying to hide it. So 20 grams of weed was so important to this man that he he refused to let it go? I think he is line for a Darwin Award.
But I think the police should get an award too. They had the place surrounded and only manage to hold one man? I think I have to agree with my pardner Jumbie and deduce that the police rather duncey.

Patrick in the Wilderness

If my information is true, Prime Minister (for now) Patrick Manning, at his San Fernando political meeting, promised his supporters that like Moses, he will lead his people out of Israel and into the promised land. I think that as an aspiring pastor, he should spend a little more time researching the tool of his trade-to-be, namely the Bible, especially since he loves to quote from it. Seeing as he is greatly misinformed, however, I will take this opportunity to enlighten him.

• At the time period Patrick was referring to, there was no nation called Israel. Israel was the name of a people who were enslaved in Egypt and had no land to call their own.
• Moses led the people out of Egypt, hence Pharaoh chasing them with chariots and the Red Sea parting etc etc.
• Moses never did get to the promised land, mainly because God gave him instructions to do a certain thing but he wanted to do things his own way. God told Moses that just because he wanted to do things his own way and not listen, he would never see the promised land.
  
• Moses died in the wilderness without entering the promised land. Joshua was the person that led Israel into the promised land, because he listened to the voice of God unlike Moses.

Mr Manning, don't you always say the voice of the people is the voice of God? Maybe come November 6th we may see a Joshua arising. Take care that you might have to start on your career as a theologian a bit earlier than you planned. In light of that, you might want to start reading the Bible, or at least listen to the voice of God.

P.S. I understand the UNC people need folks with Photoshop skills so check my work above and give me a call sometime ok?

School Daze

Mrs Dagger, who is an educator in one of our nation's not so esteemed Government-run educational establishments, will on occasion arrive home and throw herself at the mercy of my ears to tell me the most unbelievable of tales. I don't know how she makes it through the day, because the stories I hear are enough to make a grown man cry.
Take for example, the class of Form Four students who actually tried to explain to their teacher that a literary device was something that one hooks up to a computer. The children actually argued the point, not giving way at all. The poor woman had to inquire of her colleagues if she was wrong and actually stupid.
This same teacher gave an assignment, and informed the students that in writing the essays, one had to use one point per paragraph, meaning that each paragraph should centre around one idea. One eager child raised his hand and asked if he could use commas too. The poor woman could not continue the class after that.
Consider the young lady who inquired as to what it meant when someone called one an "embassy." Clearly she meant imbecile. How ironic.
How about the young student when asked in a Principles of Accounts exam to explain what capital was, wrote Port-of-Spain.
One lively lad deduced that the capital of Venezuela was V. Indeed it is, eh.
Consider that it is only the sixth week of the school term and all these events have happened within this time frame. Yes, these are true stories, I kid you not.
And this lack of knowledge doesn't only extend to the lower forms. Sixth Formers are also subject to this stupidity. Consider the entire class of Sixth Formers who didn't know what or where Quebec was. Well all except for one bright lady who said that 'quebec" was the position or place one was in, for example in front or behind. I am still trying to figure that one out. Perhaps someone can help me. Maybe the poor child was thinking of "queueing up?" I don't know.
What I do know is that our education system is in a really sad "quebec."

Vote for GOD!

After all the nonsense going on in the political arena these days, GOD has finally decided to step in. I for one am glad to hear this. For too long the country has been run without GOD. Even Mr Manning, who says he's a born-again man seems to be operating without consulting GOD. We seem to have become a society without GOD. This is strange since it is a known fact that GOD is a Trini (or ten of them.) GOD seems to be Alien to everyone in T&T right now, however.
Now that GOD has stepped in, I think things will change. People will think about GOD more now.
Imagine if we let GOD run the country. Things would certainly be different with GOD in charge of everything. People would look to GOD for all the answers. Now our country has new hope thanks to GOD.

God help us all!

Trinidad gone to the dogs

From the Trinidad Guardian of Friday 31st August, 2007

Prime Minister Patrick Manning may not have moved into the prime-misterial $148 million mansion and diplomatic centre at La Fantasie in St Ann’s, as yet, but these two dogs, which were able to gain entry onto the private premises, took time to swim, frolic, relax and lovingly rub noses in a man-made watercourse during yesterday’s media tour of the residence.

So he now get the thing and already it gone to the dogs? This country real jokey yes. First electricity cut off during the grand opening of the illustrious facilities, in addition to which the generator fail to work properly, and now we have a security breach by two pot hounds. Then again maybe they was invited guests. Maybe they was the first visitors to the diplomatic centre.

Or maybe this country really gone to the dogs and we not even near being ready yet.

Law and Disorder....Criminal Minds

So the police killed seven people last night and I have to say that in six of those cases I am
not sorry at all. In my books, only one of those people was an innocent. Wendy Courtney was killed by a stray bullet as she tried to close her window to protect herself. (Please note: A window is hardly likely to stop a bullet. The best thing to do is get as far away from the window that you can.) Still, it was sad that she had to die because some stupid fellas decided that they wanted to follow the wrong path. Of course the families of those killed are not likely to admit that their loved ones were on the wrong path. According to the mother of one of the men shot, a 17-year-old boy to boot:

"My son was working to buy his school-books and was waiting for his CXC results, he was a hard-working boy."

Hear more:

Friends of Blake and Lewis, who wished to remain anonymous, also angrily expressed their feelings saying "the police willfully kill the men, they had no gun on them, nothing to deserve what they get."

So all the men that police shot yesterday were innocent. Police just decided that these random men, going about their random business needed to be killed yesterday. Police said "You know what, we have too much bullets today. Let's go open fire on some innocent men and kill them, then say that they shot at us first."

It's amazing. If we go with what the families of men who are killed or arrested by police, there are no criminals in Trinidad and Tobago.

I think the families of these people who know that their relatives are involved in shady activities and say that they are innocent, while they reap the benefits of their nefarious deeds are just as much criminal as the ones they try to protect.

In my book if the police had to shoot at you then you were up to SOMETHING and it couldn't be good.

The empty cave

Some time ago my wife decided that she would visit her moms for a few days in these August holidays. Sort of a mini-vacation. She left on Tuesday and I started to lick my chops. This was the first time I would get a long stretch of "man time" since we have been married. Needless to say, I was chomping at the bit planning what I would do with my time alone in my cave.
It hasn't turned out the way I planned it.
Tuesday evening I couldn't find anything to eat. I munched on some dry bread and Coke. That night I realised that the bed that seems too small is kinda big when you're alone in it.. and cold.
Wednesday morning I got up late for work. She wasn't there to wake me up in that annoying way she does that guarantees I get up. I didn't have breakfast. I had to buy lunch. Dinner was boring.

Last night I tried hugging the pillow.. that didn't work.
This morning I woke up even later. The bed grew last night I think.

She's coming back tomorrow and to tell the truth I'm kinda glad. An empty cave sucks big time.

Mentally Disabled Government

So champion for the rights of the disabled in Trinidad and Tobago George Daniel score a big victory in court yesterday. Quoting today's Trinidad Guardian:

The disabled community scored a major victory in the San Fernando High Court yesterday when a judge ruled that the State’s failure to provide wheelchair access to the Hall of Justice was in violation of their right to freedom. The State was ordered to put necessary measures in place to ensure they had direct wheelchair access to the court with immediate effect. Ruling in favour of president of the Trinidad and Tobago Disabled Peoples’ International (DPI) local chapter George Daniel in a constitutional motion against the Attorney General, Justice Nolan Bereaux ordered the AG to pay all Daniel’s legal costs.

Now hear the interesting part:

Through his attorneys Anand Ramlogan, Mikela Panday and Joan Ramnarine Furlonge, Daniel filed the motion in March 2005, challenging the denial of access by wheelchair-bound people to the Hall of Justice.

So since 2005, a disabled person sue the State because he couldn't get into a Government building that the Trinidad people paying tax for. Now what a smart government woulda do, is to build a nice lil ramp for disabled people to get into the Hall of Justice. How hard is it really to build a ramp? I mean even a CEPEP crew could do the job in less than two years. They coulda even have a big opening ceremony and cut ribbon and thing and talk bout how they progressive and so on. But no, not my government. They not that bright. Instead:

The AG was represented by attorneys Christopher Hamel-Smith and Kavita Jodhan.

So instead of building the ramp for the disabled people, the AG hire two lawyers to justify why he shouldn't make it easy for the disabled to access a Government building.

The State was ordered to put necessary measures in place to ensure they had direct wheelchair access to the court with immediate effect.

So now, the State have to pay legal costs for Georgie D and his lawyers plus still build the bloomin' ramp immediately.

Clearly we dealing here with people in charge who are mentally deficient. But then again is a case of the little people not really being important to them. Do big business and to hell with the small man.
Well take that mister AG. Now you have to obey the ruling of the court eh. I mean, if the AG doh obey the law then tings real bad. Unless he appeal.
Wait.. you really go appeal boy? Nah!

Soup-a-not Fly

Meh friend de Brazilian girl telling meh for weeks now that Miss Carol in Colsort Mall have the best soup in Trinidad and Tobago. Now I did know that wasn't true because meh mother have dat trophy already. But I figure Miss Carol hand must be nice too, since she getting rate up from Brazil girl.

So today the place was lil cold as rain was falling whole day and the thermostat in the office really didn't care to make we feel any warmer. Brazos ask meh if I ent want a Miss Carol soup for lunch to warm up. Now I am a man that prefer to chew my lunch thank you very much. Drinking soup cannot full my belly. I need solid food. But Miss Brazil say the soup full of green fig and cow heel and dumpling and thing to full belly. So I say arright, bring one for your boy.

Who tell me do dat.

When ah open de bowl I coulda swear it was a bowl with gravy stew. De thing was brown, brown and oily. And I coulda swear I was by the beach, because all I was seeing was water in de bowl. Well, ah tell mehself maybe the fig and dumpling down to the bottom of de bowl because them things heavy. So I say I go drink out some ah de brown beach water and I go find some real food later down in the bowl.

Well from de first sip I realise Miss Carol soup was the hottest thing around. But only because like she empty de whole pepper sauce bottle inside it. I feel like I was drinkin molten lava yes. Meh eye start to water, but I eh know if it was because of de pepper or if it was because I realise I waste meh money.

After all dat I still say I will give Carol a chance to prove sheself. All this time I still lookin for meh dumplin and I ent find it. Ah find two bun up piece of sweet potato and a marasme piece of cow heel. Apparently the poor cow was wearing a steel tip boots, fuss the meat hard, hard. I find more sweet potato, and more sweet potato and I start to feel real real sour. I find a lil piece of pumpkin too somewhere. Just when I reach de bottom and start scraping Styrofoam, ah find de dumpling. One marasmous piece of flour half inch long and quarter inch wide. I spend $20 for this. Yuh know Miss Carol not getting my money again.

The most beautiful thing

Tonight my wife said one of the most beautiful things I've ever heard her say. She said:
"I might not be able to do the latest dance, but I can write a song for you, and tell you how much I love you."
"I may not have the body you want me to have, but my heart is all yours."
"I might not want to go with you to football games, but I was there with you when your father died, and my heart broke because you were in pain."

That was seriously deep, and I felt somewhat selfish.

Beasts in Human Form

From the Trinidad Express Thursday June 28
Nurse robbed, beaten: police hunt for 3 men
Richard Charan South Bureau

Police are hunting for three men believed to have robbed and beaten a nurse with the sledgehammer they used to break down a door to get to her and her money.
Latchmin Rampersad, 51, was reported to be conscious and alert at the Mt Hope Hospital yesterday but she was unable to eat or speak because of her injuries.
Rampersad, who is a native of Guyana, has a home in Minnesota, United States, where she lives with her husband, an air traffic controller, and two children.
The couple are building a house at Pierre Road, Charlieville, as a vacation home.
Rampersad was in Trinidad to oversee the construction.
Late Monday night, four men broke down the back door of the house and attacked Rampersad in her bedroom.
The attackers stole her jewelry and $90,000-money she withdrew from the bank to pay for building material.
Her cousin and neighbour Doolarie Durga said yesterday: "They beat her so bad they thought they killed her.
But she threw her body on the ground and pretended to be dead.
About half hour after they left, she got up and ran across to us. Her head and front of her body were covered in blood. We wrapped her head with a towel. Now we don't know if God will take her or if she will come out of it."
Rampersad wore gold rings which the thugs ripped off her fingers, Durga said.
Rampersad, who left Trinidad about 20 years ago, returned earlier this year.
Her husband was expected to return to Trinidad yesterday.

I haven't posted here for a while because I have been suffering from an extended case of writer's block, but this article has gotten me angry enough to want to say something. What kind of monster would actually think it in his mind to beat another human being with a sledgehammer? I mean this is an implement used to destroy concrete. What venom does it take to strain against the weight of a heavy hammer, lift it and bring it crashing down onto the head of a defenceless woman? Did they feel any emotion when they heard the sickening thud of metal meeting flesh and bone cracking? Who are the people that do these things? Do I know them? Do they live on my street? Do they have any feeling in their hearts?

To make it worse, obviously this was organised by someone who knew she had the money. Was it an inside job organised by an acquaintance? Friend? Family? Perhaps the teller at the bank?
Is it right that people work hard for their money and some illiterate fool who decided he didn't want to study and make a life for himself decides to take it?

I think that Trinidad has really gone to the dogs now. Hardly anyone cares about anything or anybody else. It's a free for all. Do what you want. Drive how you want. Steal, kill, destroy. There seems to be a darkness over the country which is getting progressively more intense. What has caused my peaceful party-loving people to become to evil? I wish I knew the answer. One thing is for certain: we need to find the answer fast, before Trinidad and Tobago goes totally to the dogs.

Minister Ra-Hell's Hospital of Horrors

From the Trinidad Guardian Wednesday 13th June, 2007
Man walks with bed to Sando hospital

BY ANIKA GUMBS-SANDIFORD

PICK up thy bed and walk.
The biblical saying has come to pass at the San Fernando General Hospital.
Unable to bear seeing Jimmy Smyke, 55, in pain while lying on a bench on ward 11, his wife Irma, yesterday returned to their home at Clarke Street, Vistabella, and brought a bed to the hospital for her husband to lie on.
The red metal bed was set up inside the ward along a corridor.
For the past four days patients at the SFGH have been forced to lie on the ground due to a bed shortage caused by overcrowding.

Yesterday patients were heard complaining about back pains as they were seen sitting on wheelchairs and wooden benches or lying on stretchers
A hurt Irma said Smyke, a heart patient, was admitted to the ward on Monday night after complaining of severe chest pains.
However, Irma said when they arrived on the ward a nurse told her there were no available beds.
“I stayed the night with my husband and as soon as morning broke and the doctor came on the ward I asked him if I could have brought a bed for my husband. He told me, ‘Absolutely,’ so I called my son and we went home and got the bed.

“This is absolutely ridiculous. If a dog sick do not bring him here!” Another patient Khsio Manickchand, 47, who slept on a mattress on the ground, said he had to share the narrow mattress with another patient.
Manickchand said he was warded at the hospital after suffering a severe virus attack.
Holding up his drips, Manickchand said: “Look at my condition and I have to share a mattress with a stranger...imagine I am sick and I am still uncomfortable.”

Look where we reach in this country. The prime minister taking taxpayers money to fix up his house nice, nice while them very same taxpayers can't get a bed to sleep on in the hospital. He talking stadium, rapid rail, interchange, smelter, jobs for all, houses for most, Caroni land for some! In the meantime, sick people sleeping on the floor, and it so bad, somebody had to bring a bed from home. In a country with oil and gas coming out our arse and money to burn, a man had to bring his bed from home so he could get somewhere to sleep in the hospital.

Mr John Rahael, you should be ashamed of yourself. As Minister of Health, your job is to make sure that people get quality health care at public institutions, both in terms of technology and customer service. Your job is not to smile and pose for the camera when the Government buys some piece of equipment and then talk about the state-of-the-art health care available in T&T. State-of-the-fart is more like it. Pictures don't lie Johnny Boy. You failing bad. With all the billions of dollars floating around in the economy, we dont even have a proper health care system.

What would it take to build a proper hospital for the people? Is our damn money you know. Not yours! We just put you there to manage it, but you not managing sh*t. Those same people who are lying in the corridors and on the floors of the nation's hospitals are the ones that are putting bread and butter.. excuse me.. caviar and champagne on your table. They are the taxpayers. But you take their money and literally kick them to the ground. You bite the hand that feeds you. One day, that hand is going to not appreciate getting bitten all the time, and you might get an unlucky blow that could land you in the hospital.

Who the hat fits

I was reading one of my IT magazines yesterday and came upon an article about Paul Young. Young is the co-founder of Red Hat, one of the most well-known distributions of the Linux operating system. The article said that in the early days of Red Hat, someone asked Young how a business that gave away it's software could compete with a company like Microsoft. His answer was one of the most profound things I've ever read or heard. He said: "It's not my goal to make my company as big as Microsoft. It's my goal to make Microsoft as big as my company."
Now if you really understand that concept, you can conquer the world. It certainly inspired me.

JFK Terror plot in Trinidad

I turned on my TV today and I was in shock. Finally the whole world knows about Trinidad and Tobago, but not for anything good. Four extremists decided that it would be a good idea to blow up JFK airport by setting off explosives in the main fuel line. These guys decided that Trinidad would be a good place to hide out while they hatched the plot. One was even a Trinidadian.
So it was all over the news that the terror suspects who tried to blow up JFK were held in Trinidad. Now on top of the crime that plaguing us every day, we have to contend with the fact that the rest of the world now thinks we're a hotbed of terrorist activity, and a "potential source of terrorist funding". My country may not be the best, but it sure ain't no hotbed of terrorist activity.

I think this whole thing was just an example of the US using the fear of its citizens to distract them from what's happening in Iraq. The plot was never in any danger of actually being executed, and the authorities knew about it from the get-go. The plotters didn't even have the equipment they needed to carry out the attacks.

On paper this would have been a potential disaster, since the fuel line runs under neighbourhoods in Queens. From working in industrial safety for years, though, and knowing something about pipelines, I think that the effects of an explosion would not have spread so far, since safety systems would shut down the entire system in seconds.

While I am not minimising the seriousness of the potential threat this attack could have been, I also think the extended media coverage was an attempt to quell the voices of discontent against the Iraq war. It's classic politics. When the natives grow restless, give them a reason to realise that they depend on you. Draw attention away from the real issue: the war on Iraq is hurting America more than it is helping it.

And as for those extremists... I am not a lover of the US or US policy. In fact, I hate US policy with a passion. But I know that the American people don't make US policy. US policy is made by men in black suits in a White House. Do these extremists really believe that if they attack the American people, it will affect the men in the black suits personally? They and their families are always safe. All you hurt are innocent people who probably don't agree with US policy either. But you don't care do you? Bloody selfish bastards. You don't care about people. You just care about your misguided mission.

In the meantime, my country is getting a worse international reputation than it already has. Nobody will care that we were the ones that invented the steel drums. Nobody will care that Dwight Yorke and Brian Lara are citizens of this country. Nobody will care that we produced two Miss Universe winners and one Miss World Winner. No one will care that we produced Olympic gold medal finalists in the 100m, 200m and also had silver medals in swimming. Who will know that we had a world boxing champ? Does anyone know that Heather Headley was born here? No, they just love her music. Nobody will know that Trinidad's Carnival is the greatest show on earth, so much that all the biggest celebrities come here to enjoy it.
That's sad, because though T&T isn't perfect, for me it's paradise.

Sticks and Stones

Media threatened at cell tower dismantling
Ruth Osman

Sunday, May 27th 2007

Media personnel were threatened by men contracted to dismantle a Digicel cell tower at Jerningham Avenue, Petit Bourg last Friday.

TV6 camera woman, Kerry Patrick, told the Sunday Express that she, along with photographers from other media houses, was taking shots of the dismantling process when the workers asked them to desist.

She said they complied but the men, who felt they were being ignored, were upset.

"One came out of the van and pelt a stone after the Guardian photographer," she said. "He missed and he came up to me with a stone in his hand."

President of the Association for Radio Frequency Emission Control in Trinidad and Tobago (ArFECTT), Peter Permell, in a press release, condemned the "unwarranted and unprovoked verbal and ... physical attack on the media personnel".

He said that the matter should be taken seriously and called on Digicel to issue a public apology to the media houses and the residents of Jerningham Avenue.

But Digicel public relations manager, Kevin Garcia, says that it is unfair to blame the company.

"We are getting reports that there may have been words between people, but there were villagers there also ... It's anybody's guess if it was the villagers or the sub-contractors," he said.

The telecommunications company is conducting investigations into the matter.

But what nonsense Kevin Garcia talking? It unfair to blame the company because the people who working for them assault media workers? And I real upset about this one because is my colleagues in the media that were attacked.
Words between people? Anybody's guess? Lets see. We have a picture!
Who is this? A villager? And why would a villager attack the media person who came to cover the very thing that they were fighting for? Wouldn't they be glad the media was there? Mr Garcia, your company has ultimate responsibility for all its workers, including sub-contractors. Unfair to blame the company? Look you get me vex yes. You hire your rango-tango people who have no behavior and then saying it unfair to blame the company?
If I hire some people to do some work in your house and they thief from you or damage something, ent is me you coming to look for?
Mr Garcia, your company's slogan is 'Expect More, Get More". Well I expected more from you.
Steups. You making me feel to switch back to the other network.

Swami's Secret

Guru, 85, held in sex assault
Phoolo Danny-Maharaj pdanny@trinidadexpress.com

Monday, May 21st 2007

An 85-year-old religious leader from India was detained by San Fernando police yesterday and, up to late last night, was being questioned by officers into allegations of sexual assault.

The spiritual teacher, or swami, who is said to have hundreds of thousands of devotees around the world, arrived in Trinidad and Tobago on Thursday and was expected to conduct Satsangh (religious discourses) across the country throughout the month.

The guru, also an author of dozens of religious books and and a composer of religious songs, along with other devotees from Trinidad and a contingent of other spiritual aspirants from India, was staying at the home of devotees on the outskirts of San Fernando.

Police reports indicated that a 22-year-old Guyanese woman who came to Trinidad at the weekend visited the religious leader on Friday.

This is when the incident was alleged to have happened.

Police reports stated that the woman visited the guru and was alone with him in a room when she was sprayed with a liquid. She alleged she was then assaulted.

The woman was taken to the San Fernando General Hospital for treatment.

Police said a medical examination was done and showed the woman had sexual intercourse.

Attorney-at-law Prakash Ramadhar is representing the religious leader.

Listen, rape is a serious crime, and should be seriously dealt with, but honestly, I want to know Swami's secret. I want to know how an 85-year old man, who judging from an photo I saw, had to be physically supported by two police officers to get up the steps of the police station, could hold down a young girl and rape her. I want to know what is that spray he used. The makers of Viagra would love to know also.

In another news report the girl said she was assaulted for an hour. I want to know how an 85-year-old man could keep it up for an hour.

Do you know how many happy women there would be if more men knew the Secret of Swami? I mean Viagra takes a while to work. This stuff has instant results! One spray and you stay. You know how much money Swami could make with this product? You know how many marriages he could save?

Seriously though, the girl said she was naked when she was sprayed. Umm.. how did she get naked? She said Swami told her to take her clothes off so he could do some ritual. Yeah right. I smell something fishy here. Time will tell if the allegations are true tho.

Hail to the Chief

Panday gets perfect bill of health
Anna Ramdass aramdass@trinidadexpress.com

Wednesday, May 16th 2007

Political Leader of the United National Congress (UNC) Basdeo Panday has been given a clean bill of health and is expected to return home today from London with his wife Oma, UNC vice chairman Vasant Bharath said yesterday.

Panday left for London earlier this month for what he said were medical checks to his heart and entire body.

"He has a perfect bill of health...though he's not a young man, his years are catching up," Bharath said in a telephone interview with the Express yesterday.

Bharath said he spoke to Panday yesterday and he (Panday) said he was in good spirits and getting ready to return home.

When one looks at the number of years Panday has struggled for this country, by walking, marching and protesting for the cause it is more than most people would endure, Bharath added.

Panday will be celebrating his 74th birthday this month.

Congrats Bas in advance on your 74th birthday and on your clean bill of health. Does that mean you could return to occupying your jail cell, seeing that the reason you're not in it now is that your lawyer was able to convince a judge that you were so sick and frail that you would die in jail? You probably don't want to huh? I know. That would keep you back from doing your work for the country, marching and protesting and calling for anarchy and blood.

Congratulations, though, on your miraculous recovery, and your ability to fight the lion again. Welcome back, though it seems like you were never really gone. Your shadow was always there with the UNC. Now the phoenix has risen from the ashes to lead the troops again.

Congrats to the UNC on the return of your leader for life. I bet he'll be around for a long time. It's good to see that you all still support him, especially Mrs Kamla Persad Bissessar. That sort of blind loyalty is exactly what's needed to move the party forward. The troops must have one mind and vision always.. the leader's. That way you're always sure who's the boss.

Oh, rats!

From the Trinidad Express, Wednesday, May 9th 2007 (Paraphrased)

A company that submitted a $21 million report containing a "number of deficiencies" has been awarded a second contract for $37 million to take another look at the country's transport problems.

Government said it was not satisfied with the report submitted by Parsons Brinckerhoff, the firm contracted to do the Comprehensive National Transportation Study (CNTS), but has since given the same company the $37 million Mass Transit Study.

"We are not satisfied and, in fact, the Ministry met with the consultants very recently and reiterated our dissatisfaction with their performance in terms of the fulfilment of obligations under the contract and we have given them a final deadline to correct these deficiencies," said Transport Minister Colm Imbert.

Imbert said that Parsons Brinckerhoff submitted its final report in November 2006 and technical officers of the project implementation unit for the CNTS undertook a detailed evaluation of the report.

In December, that unit advised that the report contained "a number of deficiencies based on the terms of reference and scope of work", said Imbert.

Imbert said that the contract for the CNTS was for $21 million, of which approximately $10 million had been paid.

The second study contracted to Parsons Brinckerhoff-The Mass Transit Study-is worth $37 million to be conducted in three phases.

Of this amount, Imbert said some $5.5 million had, so far, been paid to Parsons Brinckerhoff.
He said the final costs for both studies were not available.
It was only last October that Government terminated Parsons Brinckerhoff, which was contracted to evaluate bids on the $1 billion rapid rail system.

This came after it was revealed there was a conflict of interest between Parsons Brinckerhoff and Bombardier, which had also submitted a bid for the Trinidad rapid rail project.

So, Mister Imbert, imagine that you give a man a work to do. The work he does "contains a number of deficiencies", translated: it was total and utter caca, yet still you give this man MORE of your money? A $21 million dollar piece of rubbish was submitted, yet still you give them ANOTHER contract for $37 million? Something not right here. Wait. I seeing a familiar name. Hmm.. Bombardier. That is not the same company that give dear old Patrick Manning a ride in their executive plane? The company that spawned rumours that Mr Manning was looking to buy a Bombardier jet? ( Something that he deny). So this same Parsons Brinckerhoff , that associated with Bombardier get a contract to do a mass transit study, right after messing up a national transportation study? Hmmm....I smelling a rat here.

Speaking of rats: From the Express of the same day:

A massive clean-up at Chaguanas and its suburbs has begun, following complaints by residents that there was an unusual number of rats roaming the area.
Mayor Suruj Rambachan said yesterday the Chaguanas Borough Corporation had taken the reports seriously and "we have started a clean-up of areas in Lange Park to rid the area of rodents".
"We expect householders to do their bit by keeping their premises clean. They should desist from throwing discarded food in open drains because this encourages rats to live there," Rambachan said.
Dr Agenath Misir, who runs the Insect Vector Division of the Ministry of Health, said the division had stepped up its rodent control campaign throughout the country and advised homeowners to report the presence of rats in their area.
Misir said rats should not be encouraged as pets. "They are dangerous rodents that cause leptospirosis, which is a deadly disease."

So the same people that dumping their rubbish all in the drains and keeping the place nasty complaining now about rats. Blame the government again for your dirty behaviour. Pelt fridge and stove in the river then complain when it flood. Throw your doubles paper in the drain and leave your Carib bottle by the side of the road. Is the government fault for not picking it up of course, so anything bad that happen is not your fault.

Well admittedly it might not be everybody doing this nonsense, but is the few nasty ones that make things bad for everyone.

And what is this about keeping rats as pets? WTF is that?

Methinks there may be an outbreak of rats of the human sort.

Rumshop Advice

From the Trinidad Express Saturday, May 5th 2007 (Paraphrased)

Prime Minister Patrick Manning's special adviser, Herbert Atwell, is paid $23,000 a month to give advice on matters of national concern among his many duties.
Atwell is employed under contract as director of public affairs for the Prime Minister, and in addition to his salary, he receives a transport allowance of $2750, a phone allowance of $500 and a subsistence allowance of $100 a day when travelling on official duty beyond 16 kilometres from the Prime Minister's office.
Atwell also enjoys an advance of $175,000 to purchase a vehicle which was bought tax free, as well as an advance to cover insurance expenses. A further advance of $20,000 was allocated to cover repairs to the motor vehicle.
Atwell's duties include reviewing and revising press releases, organising meetings with Manning internationally and locally, making recommendations to Manning to organise events, conducting meetings with citizens and organisations seeking Manning's intervention, as well as providing briefs to the PM about national concerns and issues.

So Patos, you paying a man $23,000 a month to advise you and still you doing nonsense? Clearly this man giving you bad advice. He ent worth the money. Listen Patrick, some of the best national advisers sitting down right now in various bars in Trinidad and Tobago. You want advice? All it costin' you is a drink.

One cold Carib and your rumshop adviser will tell you that you losing popularity because of your damn arrogance and not caring what people say or feel. These are the same people that vote for you that you snubbing now. These are the same people that could NOT vote for you later.

Another Carib and you will find out that Trinbago people getting wise now. They say if you put a crapaud in a balisier tie to run for elections people will vote for it. Not so again eh. All that free education we getting.. we using it eh.

A nip of puncheon and you could find out that building a big big stadium in San Fernando doh make sense if the people still can't go to the hospital for some basic healthcare. If your population not healthy, which sports they going to play? People sleeping all on the ground in the hospital and you building big big stadium for who to play in? Your adviser like he himself sick. Hmm.. I'll drink to that! Another round!

What bout the water problems? Ah bottle of Johnnie Black and you will find out that it not right that for years and years we know that all WASA pipe leaking and WASA in a mess. Instead of fixing the water problem though, you decide to build a big big smelter that nobody in the country except you want, to pollute the little bit of water that we have. When people in the country start to bawl you say you giving $600 million to fix up WASA. This is right after you say you giving $600 million to fix up road. So after we fix up de road, WASA could come and dig it up again. Anodder $600 million. Meanwhile, poor people in Barrackpore bathing in chicken farm water and drinking it too. Lawd meh head spinning. Like I drink?

Another rounds of Johnnie dey, Patos boy. Nice. All the big big building you constructing, that driving the prices up. Your buildings going up and prices going up too. You ent doin nothing to help control high prices, but instead you contributing to it. What you say? We have to develop these industries to progress? Eh heh? Take a trip down Singapore pardna. Them doh have much natural resources, only human resources and still them economy among the best in the world. Them decide that this is the age of technology and computer run tings. So them developing plenty computer business. They have oil business too eh, just like we, but them concentrating less on dem smoky industry and moving with the times. Electronics and ting. Ah read dat on de Intahnet Patos. You know what dat is? You know what a computer is?

Most importantly Patos, and you getting this one free because my head spinning and I cannot drink anymore. God give you two ears and one mouth for a reason. You does talk too much stupidness, Patrick. Listen to what you saying sometimes nah. Some of the tings you say, you embarrassing yourself and the country. Better to say you ent know, but you will find out and get back to we. But doh say the first thing that come out your mouth, nah. They say George Chambers was duncey? Patos, I feel you is the man that have that title right now eh.

See? That ent cost you no $23,000, and you getting advice that working. So hear what to do. Fire Herbert Atwell and hire the first drunkard you meet in any rumshop. It go be money well spent.
Cheers!

A new vision

The exams are over, school is out and some of the stress is off of me. Feeedom! I decided to take my freedom a couple of notches higher and get myself some contact lenses. I never know that they could be so liberating. After wearing Coke bottle lenses for almost 30 years (don't try to guess my age), this new experience was liberating. It was also very strange. My brain was having difficulty relating to the fact that I didn't have to adjust my lenses on my face to see something up close. In fact the brain was finding it hard to accept that I didn't have to go up close to see stuff at all. I went to the barber and I could see everything he was doing. I didn't have to fish for my glasses when he asked if the cut was OK. The glare was a bit much though, so I went out and got me some shades and I looked..cool! The nerd was gone! An amazing transformation.
I kinda like the nerd though, so I don't think he's going very far. He's still going to be around a lot.

Fuel me once, fool me twice

Today I had to solve a moral dilemma and it was really hard to choose. You see there is a particular service station which will remain unnamed that I like to go to to fill up my gas tank. My inspiration was that they always were helpful and friendly and gave good service. From my regular visits I started talking to one of the girls working there and we struck up a pretty good friendship. She loved old talk and I love to old talk.

The other day she told me something really strange. She said that when I wanted to buy any fuel treatments or injector cleaner to come to her and not go to anyone else. She didn't tell me why, but I figured something was up. Eventually after I pressured her she gave me the story. Apparently, every time I bought a treatment, some of the other workers would take an empty bottle, pretend it was full and stick it in my tank as if it was a full bottle. She also made me promise not to let them know that she told me about it. Let me tell you I was angry. I mean I trusted these people. I thought I was getting good service, but what I was getting was set up. The thing is I hadn't seen it for myself. But it did occur to me that one of the guys especially, would actually bring a bottle and remind me it was time for a treatment. Before he "threw" it into my tank he would try to send me over to talk to my friend. I didn't think anything of it until I heard of the scam and put two and two together.

Today I thought I would find out for sure. I pulled up to the gas station, and sure enough, the trickster was there with his "bottle" of injector cleaner. He asked if I wanted treatment and I said yes. True to form he tried to send me over to talk to the girl, but this time I didn't move. I looked at his hands all the time. I saw him open the bottle and I saw that the seal had been punctured already. I saw him try to stick the bottle in quickly, but he wasn't fast enough for me. I called his bluff and he got bazodee, insisting that the bottle was full. I pulled it out and shook it... Empty bottle. Not a drip. You know, he was still insisting that the thing was full and "gallantly" offered to put in another one just because I didn't believe him. But he knew he was busted. This time, he went for the real stuff and I stood right there lookng at him as he emptied it. I told him how nasty he was, and he didn't like that.

When I left though, he went after my friend, because he knew that she was the only one that would make me wise to the scam. She was mad with me, after, because she said they would victimise her now. She said I should have just done what she said and come to her to buy the treatments.

Here is the moral dilemma. I am not the only victim of this scam. Apparently it's almost like a code of practice at that place. Isn't it my moral responsibility to expose the tricksters? The thing is, if I do that, I could be exposing my friend to victimisation, and possible violence. So what is the right thing to do? I really was in a bind, and she was on the verge of tears, begging me not to tell, so I promised her that I wouldn't blow the lid. But let me tell you I don't feel good about that at all. I feel like I'm not doing the right thing by letting other hard-working people get scammed. But I also don't want anything to happen to my friend because she's a nice girl. This one is really hard for me to figure out. What's the right thing to do?

This thing called life

One again death has dared touch those associated with me. Easter weekend I heard of the accident that claimed the life of two men who were returning from looking at drag racing. I heard the report that one of them was a coconut vendor at the Mon Repos Roundabout, and I briefly thought of my friend but dismissed the suggestion. You see my coconut vendor was one of the nicest people in the world. And people like that are not supposed to die. Every Sunday I would go to him not just to get a couple of cold nuts, but also a healthy serving of belly-laugh and old talk. My coconut vendor was a born comedian, a happy soul. People like that are not supposed to die. After the old talk and comedy he would usually me a discount on the coconuts and often he would even give me some free nuts to take home. He was a generous guy, and people like that are not supposed to die.
But die he did at 5.30 am on Easter Sunday morning. The car he was in hit something on the highway and flipped over and that was the end of those special moments. Just two weeks before we were laughing and joking and I never thought that it would be the last time I would ever see him.
But that's the thing about life.. no matter what, one day we're all going to leave this earth one way or another. The important thing is to always tell those you love that you care for them because you may never get another chance. You've also got to make sure you live life in such a way as to be prepared for the afterlife.

Puff, Puff, Pass De Money

Allyuh, dis is a true story eh. Ah not lyin. Ah did always wonder why it is a smoker go quicker give yuh a cigarette than give you ah dollar to buy de same cigarette. For example meh friend Sexy Girl. Sexy Girl always giving away cigarette to everybody who want. Like she living Mount D'Or, de amount of cigarette she does have. She does move like she own de tobacco company.
De odder day I try someting. I ask Sexy Girl for a dollar borrow. "Not at all," she tell meh. "I ent have no dollar to spare." So I try anodder angle. "Gimme a cigarette den," I ask she. "I woulda give yuh one, but yuh doh smoke," she tell meh. Eh heh. True.
I decide to get to the root of de mystery. I ask she why it is she quicker gimme a cigarette than gimme a dollar when is de same dollar for de cigarette. Hear she: " Well I not stupid, I could use de dollar to buy annoder cigarette!"
Talk done.

Oh my God!

One thing that jumped out at me in the aftermath of the massacre at Virginia Tech in the US yesterday, is the amount of people that started to pray. Everybody was praying for loved ones, for victims, for families. Even in the memorial service today everybody was talking about God and trusting in Him. The funny thing is, this is the same America that is trying to get rid of God and spiritual values. Now when there is a tragedy, everyone wants God to comfort them, Now everyone wants Him. Well I say what about having God around some more. Maybe then we wouldn't see so many tragedies like these. Just my two cents.

Stumped!

So the Windies have flunked out of the Cricket World Cup and I might be the only West Indian male who does not even care. Seriously, I find cricket rather boring. I do support the Windies when they are playing, though and the CWC was no different. I even actually looked at the entire match against South Africa. Now I can't profess to be a cricket expert, seeing as I'm not a fan of the game. but something struck me yesterday while I was looking at it. The score was 36 for 2 with the Windies needing 357 runs to win. Now in a situation like this, the captain of a team would be worried. He could not be happy about the situation at all. But at this point, the camera caught captain Mr Brian Lara laughing and chatting away as if he really didn't care if he was winning or losing. At least that's how it looked on camera. Only when he realised the camera was on him (and it was for a long while) did he put on his serious face. Add to that the talk that Lara and other members of the team were seen feteing the night away in clubs on the nights before the Windies games and you can tell that obviously the players aren't really serious. But why should they be serious anyway? Win lose or draw they get big salaries, cushy sponsorship deals and the supporters will pack out the stadium to support every time. Why bother to work hard if you getting pay anyway? That's only sense. The players are just using common sense, working smart and not hard.Suppose we here in the Windies were like the Pakistanis.. when they lost, the people burned the team in effigy and I think the players were actually afraid for their lives. I don't think that's the way to go, but the fact is that there is no accountability from the players for their poor performance. Even "lowly" Bangladesh did better than us.I'm not a cricket fan like I said, but I'm a West Indian and I think that something needs to be done to stop the embarrassment.

Beam Me Up. Scotty

This last week has been real pressure. I just realised that exams are around the corner and I have a ton of labs and projects to hand in. I also think I don't know half as much as I should, especially in the Digital Electronics class. Added to that, I have been having some strange dreams lately. Last night I dreamt that my house was on fire, then it turned out that my house was actually an island in South Africa. Then the whole island became part of Trinidad again. A couple of nights ago I dreamt that aliens were trying to abduct me and I had to hide all over Trinidad. This one has been a recurring dream since i was a kid. The strange thing about this time.. after the dream, I woke up with my glasses on. I NEVER go to sleep with my specs on so how did they get on my face? That freaked me out let me tell you. I still can't explain it. Maybe I sleepwalked and put them on. Or maybe it was more than a dream. I think I need to stop working so hard though. It's taking a toll on my mind it seems. I need to catch up tho.. Two weeks till exams and I still have 8 labs and 4 projects to hand in. This is going be a long week.

God on the Line

Once again I've found something that annoys me, but I think this one is undoubtedly justified. At my church there are signs posted all over "Please switch off cellphones during service." Now the very fact that a church would actually need to post these signs is disturbing in itself, considering the whole issue of respect and so on. What's even more disturbing, though is the fact that people see these signs, sit next to them and still ignore them. This morning for example, during the prayer time at church, someone's phone decided to go off, and it was LOUD. (I think that the default Nokia ringtone is the most annoying ringtone ever invented.) The person to whom the phone belonged, apparently out of pure embarrassment, decided to disown the poor phone which kept ringing away, calling for its owner.

What I want to know is, though, why does someone not know that a churchgoing person is actually IN church on a Sunday morning? If they knew the person was in church I'm sure they would not call. So clearly whoever is calling said churchgoing person doesn't know that they actually go to church on Sunday. That's the most disturbing thing of all. I think maybe some folks might need a call from God himself.

Goodbye Big Guy

I'm feeling a bit sad now because I got some bad news yesterday. One of my good friends, a talented singer who I grew up playing music with died in Thailand yesterday. Apparently he was in the process of lighting a gas stove when it exploded and burnt him badly. This happened last week but I didn't know. I only got the call when he died. He succumbed to kidney failure yesterday.

Although he was halfway around the world and we hadn't communicated in years his death still affects me. I remember the good times we had. He had such a musical range. I remember he would be singing a bass part in one verse and then surprise everyone with a falsetto in the other. He had a thing for big, fast gas-guzzling cars. He was like 6 feet tall and full of muscle and could probably rip phone books in half. He had a scandalous laugh that would draw you in and you just had to join him. He was good with his hands and could make anything that you wanted. He would always assure me that I was a pretty good bass player and didn't actually suck at it. He had a zest for life and a desire for excellence. He was just a great guy.

All that was ended yesterday because of a damn stove. That doesn't seem fair to me. But God knows best. Can't question Him.

Rest in peace Chadwick.

Yo ho ho and a tube of rum

This is why I love Trinidad and Tobago. It's the ingenuity of the people. You think the ICC could stop them from bringing their alcohol to the Cricket World Cup? Why pay $30 for a drink of rum from a band of pirates when you have free rum at home. Put it in a tube of sunblock and enjoy your cricket. I wish nobody would have patronised the ICC with their outrageous prices, and with them killing the spirit (pun intended) of the game. I think my people are some of the most ingenious people in the world, and the could acheive great things if they set their minds to it.

My New Hobby

I've decided to put my penchant for being grumpy and anal to good use. My new hobby is calling companies when I see their company vehicles being driven by maniacs and reporting the driver. I am finding immense pleasure in doing this. My wife thinks I'm being wicked but I think I'm doing the company a favour. I mean a company vehicle advertises that company. I don't think any business wants to be known for being filled with uncouth, insane people. Well, the Government is, but they don't care anyway.

Think about all the money companies could save by avoiding accidents because the stupid driver would think twice before driving like a fool again. And trust me- a large number of company vehicles are being driven my maniacs. One time one of them came flying down the wrong side of the road and pulled in front of me, almost sideswiping my car. What pissed me off most about that is that he had the audacity to grin at me and salute, as if it was a major accomplishment. This man was driving a minivan full of people. But they seemed to think it was great driving too. Needless to say, his boss got to find out about his behavior, and Mr Boss sounded angry. Another one almost killed my brother and sister in law. He was driving way to fast and hit a car from the back, which in turn hit my family. His excuse...the other guy stopped too suddenly in front of him and he couldn't stop in time. The cops didn't buy that story. Not from the distance that the skid marks spanned. He was just an insane driver.

The success of my mini-mission depends, however, on whether the bosses actually care that their drivers are insane. But I mean right on the back of the vehicle is written "How am I driving? Call (XXX) XXXX, so clearly they should care. I just wish I had a video camera so I could record the stupidity and send it to the company. I'm just doing my part to help stop the madness.

Procrastination is good

They say procrastination is the thief of time. That might be true, but yesterday I proved that procrastination is a very good thing sometimes.

It all started a few months ago when two of the switches on my mother's electric stove went bad. Knowing a little bit about electricity, I decided that I would fix them. I bought the replacement switches and promptly put them in a corner and forgot about them. Ever so often I would remember and promise myself to fix it. I even took the stove apart once to fix it, then discovered that I didn't have any spade clips, and the electrical store was out of that size of clip. Back into the forgotten corner the switches went.

Yesterday, a circuit breaker went bad in the house, so I called in an electrician to do the repairs. I saw the opportunity there to get the stove fixed, so I asked him to do that too. I left for work happy that everything was working fine.

Later that evening my wife called me in a panic. Apparently there was a short circuit in one of the burners on the stove, which caused a big electrical explosion and a small fire. Fortunately it was only the stove element that was burning.

So why is procrastination good? If it was me that had fixed that stove they would have said I didn't know what I was doing and blamed me for the fire. This way, I keep my credibility. Procrastination is good.

P.S. I was going to type this blog yesterday but I thought it might be safer if I put it off for today instead.

The law is an ...

Rush hour traffic is never pleasant. For me it's even more unpleasant because in addition to facing almost two hours of traffic to get to work in the morning, I have to face it again in the evening after work, on my way to classes where I have to try to stay awake for three mind-numbing hours.

So yesterday it didn't put me in a good mood when on the turnoff from the highway onto Don Miguel Road there was a long line of traffic. An earnest traffic cop had stopped a whole line of cars, presumably those who were trying to gain an extra three seconds in the traffic by making an illegal u-turn. Being a law abiding citizen, i thought it best not to drive around the policeman's line on my own, but to wait until I had permission to do so.

After I waited for about a minute, Mr Traffic Cop beckoned me forward impatiently and with attitude. Apparently I was not supposed to wait, but to drive around his line. Fine. When I reached to where he was he stood partially blocking my way and looking at me, so I stopped and looked at him. He looked at me. We looked at each other for a long while. Finally he said "Where yuh going?" I said "I'm going that way," pointing in my intended direction. His response was "Well go yuh way nah!" If I used to curse, I would have gotten myself charged that evening. Clearly this little boy (he seemed to be still in his twenties) decided that his uniform gave him God status. My response.. "People like you are the reason why other people don't like the police." I think the way I said it put him in shock. He didn't say a word. I went my way fuming mad but I was able to control my anger without killing anyone.

Shift to today. I dropped my wife off to her job, parked the car in the car park where she works and walked to the shop on the corner to buy some breakfast for us. On my way back I saw a police motorcycle flying pell mell down the street like a corbeau out of hell, almost hitting a car or two, bobbing and weaving from left to right. Guess who it was? Yes.. my foolish friend from the day before. I remembered his face plain as day. I'm not too sure if he remembered me. I doubt he did.

My deceased father was a policeman and he was a man of honour and humility. He never tried to gallery himself like the cops we have now. The men he worked with were the same also. He was tough when needed be, but never rude or abrasive. He didn't need a uniform to give him authority. His character was his authority. Even out of uniform you could tell he was a cop and you had better straighten up.

I miss my dad. May 1 will make it two years since he died, but if he was still alive he would have a thing or two to teach these guys who need to learn the real meaning of respect.

Things that annoy me

Well the URP ghosts have finally finished the work on the part of the drain outside my house and I must say it looks good. I had a problem though with the fact that they left their rubbish outside my house for days after they were finished working. There was old wood with nails sticking out, a whole pile of empty cement bags, big stones of varying sizes and other junk piled on my lawn and on the street outside my house. I went outside to take a picture of the mess to blog about it here, but my neighbour talked me out of it. He seems to think I'm anal retentive. And I realise that I am! There are a whole lot of things that annoy the heck out of me. As a result, I've decided to compile a list of things that annoy me as a result. It's a long list and still not in any way complete. I even have them arranged in categories. I'm just giving a sample of 2 categories.


Telephone love

1: People who call me on the phone then ask who I am. Heck you called Me!! Who the hell are you?

2: People who call my number and when I say it's a wrong number they just hang up. They have no manners! I have been known to use my caller ID to call them back and tell them as such.

3: People who when I tell them it's a wrong number ask me if I'm sure. Nooooo I'm not sure who lives in my house. Let me check and make sure no one named Philbert lives here.

4: People who when I tell them it's a wrong number keep calling back. What are you deaf????

5: People who shout when they are on the phone. Hello!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The phone has a microphone and amplifier!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No need to shout!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I don't need to hear all your business!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Grammar Grief

1: There is no need to write the decimal value of a number after you spell it in words, or vice versa. It's annoying when people write ten (10). I know what ten is .. I also know what 10 is. I also know that 10 is the same as ten. Please stop!

2: Learn how to use an apostrophe. It's theirs, not their's ....we are Trinis, not Trini's .. it's hers, not her's. Thank you.

3: PLEASE DO NOT SEND ME EMAIL OR INSTANT MESSAGES THAT ARE IN ALL CAPS.. THAT IS LIKE SHOUTING AT ME! Thank you.

4: And on that note.. please do not send me forward mail. If you really must, however, put some care into it. I don't want to be trying to pick the message out from all those little arrows that come after every line. And try to take out the email addresses of the 2000 people that got the mail before me. They are of no use to me unless I want to send spam. Finally, I don't want to have to be opening 20 attachments to finally see the message that you want me to see. I will not open them. Put some care into the messages you send me.


My word! I'm really turning into a grumpy old man. I think I need to work on that. But please don't email me about it.

Blessings

Yesterday was a most interesting day.
I had to go the the licensing office to get an amendment to my vehicle registration certificate because I just noticed last Saturday, after 3 years, that the vehicle engine number that the licensing office had put on the certificate was wrong. The last number was supposed to be an 8 and they put a 3. This might seem like a small thing but I could have potentially been in big trouble if something like an accident had happened.

Now going to the licensing office is a task in itself. There is always a crowd of people there and I had already made up my mind that it was going to be a really long morning for me. I asked my partner from work to come and hang out with me while I waited, but he was having none of that. Waiting in that madness was not his favourite thing to do either.

So on my own I drove into the licensing office, went around back to the inspection bay area, passing all the throngs of people and there was... no one waiting. The line was empty. This has never happened. I was there alone and I was able to get them to check out the engine immediately. The guy who verified the number gave me a document and said I had to go to the main building and see the chief clerk who would do the necessary changes to the certificate. So anticipating a long wait, I went into the main office and I saw one million people inside waiting their turn. I took a number, which I had to do to see the chief clerk and sat down. The indicator said they were on number 52 and I had number 64 which usually translates into 3 hours of waiting. So I sighed and sat down for the inevitable ordeal.

Suddenly the numbers started changing rapid fire... no one was there who had pulled them. They had left! I was next! I was the only one there to see the chief clerk! I didn't have to wait. The clerk went inside, did the changes and came back out with the new document. I was happy until he said that I had to go to the cashier and pay $20 for it. So they made an error, but I had to pay them to fix it. I was already in a good mood, though, after those two lucky breaks so I didn't get too riled up. I went over to the cashier, who of course had a line a half a million people long and after being there for 5 minutes, I realised that I didn't have any cash. I had given the Lady Love most of my money that morning. Well I had $17... $3 short. Worse again, in this modern day and age, the licensing office did not have a debit machine.

I went back to the chief clerk's office and there was another guy there. I explained to him that I didn't have the cash and that I would have to come back. The nearest ATM machine was in town, so I would have had to drive over there and come back.. a big time waster in all that traffic. The guy looked at me, sighed and said "Hear this. Ent you from South? Take it and Merry Christmas." I got my thing free! I mean how often does that happen?

Yesterday was full of blessing and I just came on here to give thanks to the Father for it. I am truly blessed.

Now I see!

So I saw this online and I thought it was funny and disturbing at the same time.

LONDON- Embattled Israeli Defense Minister Amir Peretz faced fresh criticism Friday after newspapers published photos of him trying to watch military maneuvers with the lens cap still on his binoculars.Peretz was inspecting Israeli troops in the Golan Heights, near the Syria border, along with the Israeli army's chief of staff, Lt. Gen. Gabi Ashkenazi, the British Broadcasting Corp. reported.The photographer said Peretz gazed through the capped binoculars three times, nodding as Ashkenazi explained what he was looking at, the British Broadcasting Corp. said.
Peretz's popularity has plummeted in the wake of Israel's war last year in Lebanon.

So the defense minister can't see what's going on, and worse yet, he's pretending to know what's going on. This one sounds familiar eh? Sweet T&T. Now I actually feel a little better. It's been proven- politicians are really the same all over the world.